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7 Tips to Successfully Introduce the New Puppy to Your Young Children

Came across this gem today as I was posting articles to Pinterest. As a dog owner and advocate of the family pet, I really liked how the author talked about meeting the dog’s needs as well as the kids’ benefit to helping with the new pet, like reading books, keeping the area free of debris, taking turns, assigning chores, etc. I read lots of good articles about this topic but this one jumped out at me as one that really thoughtfully summed up the steps to take and the reality of having puppies and kids.

Enjoy,

Katherine

Keeping Rules and Expectations Consistent when you have Guests

Note:  This week I will be re-posting an earlier blog.  I feel that the topics covered will especially help families during the Thanksgiving holiday.

Good Afternoon,

Today I will be talking about hosting guests at your house.  I remember when I was growing up…if we were bad under normal circumstances, we would get the “usual” punishment, but if we were bad when we had guests or were guests, the punishment was so much worse.  I knew the second my mom made “that face…” I was doomed.  I am laughing as I write this, just thinking about my parents and how mean I thought they were.  A little fun turned into a lot of trouble pretty quickly.

Below are some basics for preparing your kids to host guests, whether it be their friends, out-of-town family, or your boss.  The ideas here cover families with kids ranging from toddler to school age.  Use the ideas that best apply to your family.  While I understand that you have had guests in your home before now, a quick reminder is always nice on how to handle talking with your kids about hosting guests.  If you are struggling in this area, now is the perfect time to institute some of the below before the holidays.

Communication
Obviously you want to let your children know that you are having guests.  Start by telling them who is coming.  If it is someone they do not know, tell them how you know this person.  Talk to them about what it means to have guests.  This means talking about the expectations of their behavior, including how they act, where they play, and what they say.  If there are other kids coming remind them of the importance of sharing their toys.  Give them feedback throughout the evening about how they are doing.

Consistency
If you have followed this blog at all you should by now see a common theme: consistency.  Above all else, the rules should not change no matter what.  It ultimately does not matter who is at your house.  If your kids break the rules, follow through with the usual punishment.  Many parents, like mine, even increase the punishment when there are guests at the house.  Ultimately, you want for people to feel welcomed and safe in your home.  Keeping the same high expectations for behavior lets your children know that they cannot get away with unacceptable behavior when guests are over.  I have turned down a few invitations to homes where I know that the kids are wild and the parents do nothing about it.

Involvement
As always, get your kids involved in preparations for guests.  If you are hosting out-of-town guests have them help clean rooms, make beds, and prepare meals.  Kids love to show off their artwork.  To keep them busy while you get ready, have them create pictures and clay sculptures to show off or give to your guests.

Guests come to your house to see you and your family.  Make it easy for them during their visit by keeping routines and rules consistent.  Talk with your kids before, during, and after, and give them feedback on how they did.  Throw in special treats if they met or exceeded your expectations.  Always involve them from start to finish.  If they know the plan and how they fit in, they will have a great chance to live up to your expectations.

I am certain that all of you reading this will either have guests or be a guest this holiday season.  Have fun!

If you found this blog helpful please subscribe/like/re-tweet/share it.  I have also added lots of good pins to my Pinterest boards, so check them out too.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Traveling with Kids

Image by cote via Flickr

Note:  This week I will be re-posting two blogs.  I feel that the topics covered will especially help families during the Thanksgiving holiday.  See below for the second post.  I’ll be resuming my posts next week.  Happy Thanksgiving!

Good Morning,

With the holidays approaching, I think now is a good time to start the discussion about traveling with your family.  Many people know that Thanksgiving travel is the busiest of the year, and with the holidays and crazy travel come a mountain of stress.  It is well worth the extra time upfront to gain confidence and control on the back-end.

Plan ahead
The weeks leading up to your travel are the most important planning period.  Getting laundry ready, snacks bought or prepared, deciding on luggage, and setting out all the things you will need are essential for a low-stress, successful trip.  Make lists to help you remember who is taking what and in which suit case.  Write down everything so that nothing is left or overlooked.

Seek advice
Check out this and other blogs and websites for tips and tricks to make your trip go smoothly.  I will be posting links to great sites at the bottom and sprinkling a few in the blog as well.  Ask friends, family, and school staff for help and advice regarding your child.  The DadLabs site has tons of great video blogs about traveling with the kids.

Car travel
If you are headed to the in-laws via car, you will want to consider several things.  Keep plenty of snacks and drinks handy for the kids to have while riding.  Make sure their seats and travel clothes are comfortable and can go the distance needed to get to grandma’s house.  You might want to travel during nap or sleep times like early morning, late evening, or in the afternoon so that the kids are naturally tired and more likely to sleep.  Plan stops along the way for stretching your legs, bathroom breaks, snacking, or running around.  It is very hard for young kids to sit for long periods of time.  Honestly, it is hard for most people.  Incentivize your trip by giving them treats, money, or toys to play with when you reach certain mile markers, towns, or minutes.  Check that all electronics are working properly before you leave home.  Extra batteries, cds, and movies are smart to have on hand.

Plane travel
Traveling via plane to your destination is somewhat of a different story and requires some different planning strategies.  Many experts say to travel early in the day.  Planes are often less crowded and more likely to take off and land on time.  Make sure your child has a good night’s sleep the night before your travel day.  This will ensure your child is well-rested and well-behaved for the flight.  It also allows them (and you) to better handle rough situations and chaos.  Take snacks, toys, blankets, or whatever your child needs to feel safe and comfortable on the flight.  Be reasonable with these items, ultimately you will be the one carrying your child and all the stuff they bring.  If your child gets motion sickness, you should speak with your doctor about some possible remedies.  I do not recommend self-medicating your child without the benefit of your healthcare provider’s wisdom.

Packing
Take the least amount of clothes and extras as possible.  The less you have to carry and keep track of, the better.  Bring a bib or two that covers your child during meals that you can easily wipe down.  Jeans and dark-colored clothes are easily worn for a few days.  Bring two pairs of pajamas in case there is an accident.  One or two pairs of shoes should be sufficient.  Remember that you can always buy things that are disposable, like diapers and wipes.  Ask friends or relatives to borrow large items such as a stroller, crib/playpen, high chair, and car seat.

I encourage you to take some time planning your trip and considering the needs of your family.  They deserve a vacation just as much as you do, so make it easy on yourself and enjoyable for them.  There are lots of great websites out there that talk about traveling with kids and lots of great products that help parents.  If you know a site or product from which others may benefit, please add it in the comments section below.  I wish everyone safe and enjoyable holiday planning and traveling this season!

Sites that you will want to check out:

Up with kids
15 Holiday Travel Don’ts
How to travel like a kid…

If you found these tips helpful subscribe/like/pass along this blog.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Caretakers – Topics to Discuss

Good Morning,

This week I am looking at the four steps in finding and selecting a caretaker for your child.  Yesterday’s post covered the information you will want to know before you invite them for an interview.  Today, I will cover some discussion topics that will be helpful in weeding out the pool of applicants.  If you plan on a family member or a friend taking care of your child, the questions and information exchanged should be the same but presented in a more casual way.  It is very important that you set the stage for a successful relationship between you and your child’s caretaker, no matter who they are.  It is also important that all caretakers know the same information and that the expectations and rules stay consistent.  This benefits your child and allows them to have a positive, consistent experience when someone else is in charge.

Some topics to discuss:

• Pay
• Paid vacation days – holidays, vacation days, when you take vacation (full-time)
• Sick days (full-time)
• Insurance offered (full-time)
• Providing food
• How often and to where your child can be driven
• Pay for mileage
• Other duties – baby’s laundry, making food, accepting deliveries, etc.
• What to do in case of emergency
• Time sheet
• Family calendar
• Reviews and pay raises – how often and using what scale
• Classes, play-dates, school
• Babysitter vs. Nanny
• Overtime, nights, and weekends (full-time)
• Pet information

You may have other questions that you will add to this list.  Not all topics above will pertain to you and you may not offer things like insurance, paid vacation, or food.  Be upfront and clear with your caretaker.  As I mentioned above, it is very important to set the stage for success.  Create an environment that allows for questions to be asked and respected.  Ultimately, you want to find a person that wants to work for you.  This is important for the well-being of your child as well as the care and respect of your things.

Take the time to do your research and find a person that is great.  It is well worth your time and money in the long run.  Being thoughtful throughout this process will better your chances of finding a perfect fit for your family.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Caretakers – Exchange of Information

Good Morning,

As I mentioned yesterday, I will be covering the process of finding a caretaker for your child this week.  It takes time, research, and commitment to find the right person for your family.  Exchanging important information is an essential part of narrowing down your prospective hires.  They will have questions for you as well.  Be ready to answer their questions so that they, too, can make sure that the chemistry is right.  Here is the second of four steps you will want to consider when looking for a caretaker.

What you need to know about your prospective caretaker:

• History with kids and the ages of those children
• Discipline methods
• Job history
• References
• Driving record
• Insurance (health, car)
• Proximity to your house from theirs
• CPR certification
• Desired schedule
• Family situation

What they need to know about you:

• Schedule – yours and your child’s
• Your expectations for them
• Health issues regarding your child

It is helpful to discuss this information with your partner before meeting with a potential caretaker.  Keeping things written down and having a log of discussion points will allow you to streamline the information.  Tomorrow I will be diving deeper into the process of finding a caretaker and offering suggestions on topics to discuss during the interview.

If you are struggling to find a caretaker for your family’s unique situation, please contact me for more personalized strategies.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Improving Academic Skills

Good Morning,

We began this week’s discussion with routines, online safety, and gadgets.  Today, I would like to provide a set of tools/activities that will easily improve academic skills.  One of the biggest concerns parents have is that they are unable to find enough time each night to help with homework or study with their children in the traditional sense.  Not to worry.  If you are among these parents, you can still find ways to incorporate academic practices into your everyday routines.

Ways to fit academics into your everyday lives:

• Read everything out loud.  Street signs, menus, numbers, everything.  The more words young children hear, the better.
• Hold family conversations.  A quick conversation can keep you up to date on what’s new with your child.
• Help with homework.  This may be a tough one to fit in, so it doesn’t have to happen every night but be sure it happens as often as possible.
• Be involved at school.  This is another tough one time-wise.  Even once a semester helps.  Make parent conferences, school plays, and parent days a priority.
• Set goals and expectations.  Tell your kids what you expect of them.  Never assume that they should “just know.”  It is much easier to work towards a known goal.
• Encourage extracurricular activities.  Everyone knows that sports, the arts, and music help academics tremendously.  They also help with discipline and self-confidence.
• Take a break.  Vacations and breaks during work times are great ways to fill up the tank for the next task.  Don’t underestimate the importance of stopping, focusing on something else, and coming back to the task.  As little as 10 minutes can do wonders for better focus and a better attitude.
• Cook together.  This tactic has it all: reading labels, counting, measuring, and conversation.  This doesn’t have to happen every night.  Even once or twice a week will help.
• Maintain structure.  Routines help eliminate guess-work and keep things moving smoothly.  If kids know what to expect they are more comfortable and confident.
• Encourage organization.  Help your child by teaching them organizational skills.  Knowing where things are cuts down on frustrating and time-consuming searches.
• Play games.  This is another all-around great tactic.  Counting, reading, and acting out (charades) encourage quick thinking and sportsmanship.
• Allow your child to keep a journal.  Lots of kids find it helpful to write or draw their thoughts.  Kids need an outlet for their emotions, questions, and ideas just like adults.
• Stay consistent.  Keeping routines and expectations consistent will cut down on fights and allow more time to have fun while learning.
• Enforce discipline.  Natural consequences for our actions are some of the best lessons we can learn.  Establish house and family rules early and stay consistent.
• Provide support.  Sometimes things do not go as planned.  Support from family is incredibly important for academic and lifelong success.

Many of you reading this blog are already fitting academics into your daily routines and lives.  If it is time to change things up, try a new tactic, or fit academics into an area that you haven’t tried before, the key is to make academics fun for your child as well as yourself.  It is wonderful to be involved with your kids’ learning and to share experiences with them in the process.  As always, if you have further concerns regarding your child or family, please contact me directly.

Sites to check out:
Parental Involvement and Students’ Academic Achievement: A Meta-Analysis
7 Ways to Improve your Child’s School Performance
How Parents and Families can Help their Children do Better in School

If you found this information helpful please subscribe/like/tweet/pass on.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Tech Gadgets and Kids

Good Morning,

Holiday shopping has begun and the most popular gifts are always the newest tech gadgets.  Electronic games and portable players are on the top of most kid’s wish lists.  While tech toys and games are commonplace among children, you need to manage a balance between face time and tech time.  How do you find time and enforce this balance?

Many parents use portable games to ease their child’s boredom and keep their behavior in check.  I agree that for situations when you expect a kid to sit and behave for an extended period of time, like on an airplane, a game or movie is nice to have.  At other times, when a conversation or family time is the goal, leave electronic games and devices at home.

Keep control over tech devices by:

• Starting with a plan that the family follows.
• Determining when you want to allow kids to have tech devices and gadgets.  Stay consistent.  Put these times on your daily calendar/schedule where kids can see them.
• Using gadgets as an incentive for kids when traveling.
• Never replacing good parenting with tech gadgets. Gadgets should not be present at the table or any other family gathering.
• Taking gadgets away as a disciplinary method if behavior needs to improve or if grades drop.
• Keeping the conversation going about tech use and expectations.  Consistency and control are key here.
• Purchasing age appropriate tech gadgets for your children.
• Talk to your kids about internet safety and online use.

If you have not had a conversation with your family and partner about tech use, now is the time.  Don’t let your kids’ lives be run by their phones, gaming devices or iPods.  Remember that you are the authority and should always be the gate-keeper for more or less time with their tech gadgets.

Sites to check out:
Technology and Our Kids with Jennifer Jolly (video)
Kids and Tech: How Much is Too Much?
A Study on Media Usage and Kids from Kaiser Family Foundation
Antisocial Networking?

If you have found this information helpful please subscribe/like/tweet/pass on.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Online Use and Safety for Kids and Teens

Good Morning,

Image by IvanWalsh.com via Flickr

I have noticed lots of technology-based charter schools and preschools popping up around my city.  My family didn’t purchase a computer until I attended high school, and I learned how to use the internet in college.  Today, I can’t imagine my life without email or online newspapers.  So much has changed in such a small amount of time…it is truly amazing.  How do parents stay on top their children’s online usage and keep them safe?  For many parents, the computer is a household necessity for their family’s academic and social needs, but are they spending the time upfront to prevent unwanted habits and predators?

Safe Surfing Strategies

• Start early in life.  Play age-appropriate games and check out kid-friendly websites together.
• Bookmark pages for your kids so they can reach them easily and without hassle.
• Set boundaries for time, websites, and online chatting.  Set up parental controls and passwords to protect against sensitive materials and inappropriate sites.
• Have one family computer set up in a community space.
• Talk to your children honestly about the dangers of chatting with strangers and online bullying of school mates.
• Teach your older kids how to use search engines and online catalogs correctly.
• Let your kids know that you are monitoring their online activities.

Here are some great kid friendly websites to check out:
Smories
Starfall
Bembo
PBS Kids
Disney
KidZui
Sesame Street

Other sites for parents to check out:

Google Family Safety Center
Kids Rules for Online Safety
Social Media and Your Children (video)

If you found this information helpful please subscribe/like/tweet/pass on.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Morning Routine Check-Up

Good Morning,

Image via Wikipedia

As I mentioned last week, now is a good time to review your routines.  I was talking with some moms last week as they were discussing how their children liked their preschools and their teachers.  One of the moms mentioned that things at school were going great, but it was hard to get her child out the door in the morning.  “He cries and doesn’t want to go, but once he is there he is fine and goes right into playing with the other children.”

For this mom, I had the following advice:

• If your routine isn’t working, change it.
• Remind your child of the expectations in the morning.
• Have things ready the night before (lunch and breakfast, clothes, school bag, sports equipment, etc.) to take the guess-work out of the morning.
• Only leave enough time to get ready and get out the door.  There is no need to rush, but stay focused.
• Keep the routine consistent.
• Realize that it is not that your child does not want to go to school, rather they want  you to give in to them.
• Keep your discipline consistent and have consequences for not following directions.

If this is an issue that you are also experiencing, I encourage you to employ the ideas above.  Look to see where your child usually breaks down and eliminate that area.  Make the morning fly by so that there isn’t time to think about putting up a fight or crying about going to school.  Your situation may differ from the one presented here so contact me to get personalized strategies for your family.

Sites worth checking out:
Nighttime routine  
Manage Morning Mayhem
9 Steps To A Great Morning Routine for Kids

If you found this advice helpful please subscribe/like/tweet/pass on.

Good Luck,

Katherine

Discipline and School Age Children

Image via Wikipedia

Good Morning,

A few weeks ago I blogged about having a conversation regarding discipline.  This dialogue can occur at any point in your kid’s life, and will likely happen multiple times throughout childhood.  Discipline should change as your child does.  As they begin making more mature decisions, they will be capable of having a more mature relationship that hopefully entails less discipline.  If you have been consistent with your discipline methods to this point, chances are good that you have established good patterns of communication and discipline with your child.  Their behavior changes when they hit school age.  Toddlers tantrum, while older kids slam doors, lock themselves in their rooms, give the silent treatment, and talk back.

Now is a good time for you to evaluate your discipline methods and make sure they fit the crime as well as your child’s personality.  The line between too little and too much is very thin and is worth some extra thought and effort.  Because school-age children are able to think for themselves, they should.  Many times, discipline measures take place because they have not thought about the long-term consequences of their actions.  At this point in their lives they are becoming young adults and the decisions they make are more permanent.

Take a look at what has worked in the past and revamp those methods.  Many methods that work for toddlers simply need tweaking to fit an older child.  Did the time out method work for you in the past?  This same idea plays out when a child has to miss an event with their friends.  Grounding a child is merely a slightly evolved manifestation of a time out.

By this age they are probably involved in extra-curricular activities such as sports, music, and the arts.  Schedule their days such that there is little or no room for trouble.  They should still have free time to do what they want, but their days should be pretty full between school, activities, homework, and family.  If you are running into problems with behavior, one potential solution involves increasing their activity level.

Another way to fit the discipline method to your child is to look at what they really enjoy doing.  The take away method has been around forever and is very effective.  Do they love sports, hanging out with their friends, or tech gadgets?  If you have invested money in these things, e.g. you have paid for sports teams, have them work to pay you back.  Hard work is also a great form of discipline.  Did they cost you time or money with their misdeeds or carelessness?  The punishment can fit the crime.

Another way to employee this method is to have them choose the consequence.  Many times kids are harder on themselves than we are.  If they choose to have something taken away for a specified period of time, they are more invested in the result.  This is another form of the idea that when you buy something with your own money, it is more valuable.  Respect your child’s choice and stick with it.  Let them know that you appreciate their involvement in their consequences.

Ultimately, the idea is to teach your children that the choices they make have consequences.  When kids are young, the most important thing to teach them is that they must listen to you for their safety and that they must depend on you for their survival.  As children mature they are able to do more for themselves.  They may not need you to feed them or keep them from running into the street.  Therefore you need to change your behavior to match theirs.  Change the discipline to match the lesson you are trying to teach.

If you have not been spending as much one-on-one time with your kids as you would like, now is the time to fit that in.  It is exceedingly valuable to know your kids at these times and allow yourself to see them as young adults and kids, not babies.  Ask them questions, tell jokes or stories, and interact any way that comes naturally.  This one action will cut down on discipline more than anything else.

Go with what works for you and your kids.  If you are struggling with discipline, change methods or seek help.  Asking teachers, doctors, counselors, and family coaches are a great way to implement some new strategies.  It is important that you stay in control of your child as they learn to make good decisions for themselves.

Sites to take a look at:

Discipline:  A Parent’s Guide for School Age Children
Discipline:  Teaching School Age Children Social Skills
Age-Appropriate Discipline Techniques

If you found this blog helpful, please subscribe/like/tweet/share.

Good Luck,

Katherine